12 posts tagged “betty”
Here is my report of yesterday, January 24, 2008, aka Katya's birthday.
7:30 am. Wake up to go purchase surprise donuts with Betty at 8 am. Surprisingly not as difficult as usually. Screw around on internet, then leave at approximately 7:48 clad in pajamas.
7:50 am. Reach car in -5 degree weather (Fahrenheit). With lack of wind and clouds, actually not that bad. However, realized on the way there that car would be completely frozen over. Betty calls at 8, informs that Katya is awake and with her boyfriend, therefore Betty cannot leave without being thoroughly suspicious. I must traverse alone to purchase the donuts.
8:10 am. Finally depart with car halfway unfrozen. While driving to donut place, hear a familiar, unpleasant flopping sound that is strikingly similar to the sound a flat tire makes when it is being driven on. Discover that it is indeed flat when donut place is reached. Horribly flat, in fact.
8:20 am. Drive very slowly to Betty and Katya's apartment. After parking, discover that previously mentioned flat tire has now detached itself from the rim. Rim appears to remain undamaged, however.
9:00 am. Katya's boyfriend very kindly offers to change flat tire to spare dummy in trunk. After much difficulty, a bigger problem is discovered. In order to prevent stinking thieves from stealing nice hubcaps, one of the five bolts is special and more different. A special key is required to take it off. Said special key is missing in action. This is very bad.
10:20 am. Receive a ride home from Betty. Terribly worried about car, especially since it is parked in a 2-hour parking zone. Contacted father, who was not very much help, and stepfather, who was nicer but of even less help because of being in Canada. Mother, who was possibly the most important of the three in this situation, could not be contacted.
10:50 am. Decide to take a nap. Screw classes.
11:30 am. Mother calls back, finally. Feeling particularly zombie-like after a very deep sleep. Mother is not sympathetic in her tones, only matter-of-fact and slightly harsh. Frustrating.
12:30 pm. Leave with Betty to get extra, more special bolt from car and visit a car shop to inquire about any possible solutions. Realize upon reaching car that keys have been left behind at dorm. Frustrating.
1:30 pm. Leave car shop fruitless. After an unsuccessful attempt with 411 to find New York Burrito, go to Chipotle and devour a delicious meal.
2:00 pm. Return to my dorm. Betty hangs around until about 2:35.
3:00 pm. Friend calls. Do best to support him through his troubles with girlfriend.
3:30 pm. Go to event with friends called Get Rec'd. Get lots of useless crap.
5:00 pm. Nap. Deep, deep nap.
6:30 pm. Wake up. Last dream had was slightly horrifying.
7:00 pm. Mother calls again. Still not too kindly about the tire. Tells me to find a boy who can fix it temporarily with "fix-a-flat" product. Also scolds for probably amassing 300 million tickets over the day, even though nothing could be done about it. I feel confused and scared. Mother is scary when she's mad...
7:15 pm. Contact Betty to take me to Wal-Mart to purchase "fix-a-flat". However, realize that it will not work if the tire is off the rim. Give up.
7:30 pm. Begin to get ready for going out at 9 to dance club/bar Sir Tango for Katya. Cannot pick a shirt.
8:30 pm. Finally decide on a shirt.
9:00 pm. Leave with Betty, Katya, Paige, and Yume for Sir Tango. Learn basic Tango steps. Sit with Yume and talk for a half hour while the rest of the girls leave to pick up forgotten IDs. Realize I have not ate dinner yet, and remain hungry the rest of the night.
11:00 pm. Too tired to dance anymore (I'm weak). Continually asked to dance. Politely refuse.
12:00 am. Traverse back to Betty and Katya's place. Pizza is ordered with much difficulty.
1:00 am. Pizza finally arrives and is enjoyed greatly. Taken home by Betty.
2:00 am. Sleep.
I need to write an essay about how I cannot accept criticism because of my mother. I'd never be able to send it to her, though. Maybe I could write a book about it.
It's something I've been pondering lately. I haven't decided if it's true or not (because it's a hard fault to admit), but lately it seems to be true.
The reason being? My mother is a very strong person, with very strong opinions, and a very high confidence. This often leads her to thinking that, subconsciously or not, she is always right. Which she usually is. (I think. She makes very convincing arguments, anyway.) Also, she does not like to lose. But she admits this freely, so.
Anyway, I think I have inherited this fierce Dragon from her. And because she is "always right", if I were ever to oppose her or voice my opinion to her, I am "always wrong". (This has been ingrained in me by now, so it really doesn't happen anymore.) Because of this, combined with my inheritance of the Dragon, I believe the same feeling might have been instilled in me.
I think, subconsciously, I believe that I am "always right". That I cannot be wrong. And I think to myself, "Don't be an idiot, of course you can be wrong, everyone is wrong sometimes." But when someone gives me an opinion, advice or the like, the Dragon is immediately awakened, my defenses are up, and I am angry. "How dare they. Who do they think they are? What an idiot." These are my thoughts.
The only thing that might derail my theory is that there is only one person that receives this anger. And that person is my roommate Britni. So, is it because of her? The way she does or says things? Do they just rub me the wrong way?
Or is it because I am close to her, and so my Dragon is awakened while it lies sleeping around everyone else? But I am also close with Betty, my roommate from last year. The Dragon is never awakened by Betty.
But therein lies another question - has Betty ever really criticized me? Or, not so much criticized, but at least given advice or an opinion? Did she every give the Dragon a chance to wake? Or does Betty just do those things in a way that it doesn't offend? For sure, she has given me advice. Last year I had many a problem, and she consoled me many a time. Yet it was always gentle, calm, subtle. Betty has a way.
So what is this shortness of temper with my new roommate? Why does she fan the flames so, with such unnatural quickness? For sure, she has known me three and a half years now, while Betty has only known me one and a half. But I have changed much. Has my one year apart from Britni made such a difference? Has staying with the calmer, completely different Betty changed my outlook? Does Britni's energy affect me in a more negative light now?
I don't know the answers to these questions right now. But this is what college is for. This is the time for us to be growing up, to learn things about ourselves, to develop our personalities more. I don't want to have an illogical Dragon within me. A wise Dragon I will accept, because a Dragon is powerful and strong, but a foolish Dragon I will not have.
Then again, young people are always fools.
(I really should keep my poetic emo posts to my Wordpress story blog. it's just better that way.)
I'm
really excited for my job. it seems like it's gonna be a lot of fun.
My boss told me I'd probably be working mostly at the counter, which is
just fine with me. It's a cute little snack shop by the pool. it
wasn't busy my first day, but they warned me that once it gets real hot
& sunny (which will be soon here, I'm sure), it'll be absolutely
packed. oh well! money is money!! <3
we're still trying to sell our house. (don't know if I ever mentioned that on here.) It's been on the market for 6 months, which is ridiculous really, because it's a beautiful house. and we can't move anywhere until we get the house sold because we need the money. the reason we need to move is because the taxes are too high in our neighborhood. it's not on any city property, so that kind of tends to happen. stupid annexation skipping over us. what jerks.
I have hopes to go visit Betty in August, depending on if I can save up the money. On a site I was looking at, http://www.studentuniverse.com/ , I found some round-trip for like, $300. it's a student flight discount site. really nifty. so, we'll see how it goes. I'm pretty bad at saving money, and there are things like gas and car insurance to pay for.
also, most unfortunately, I know I've been pmsing [warning, post starts getting emo from here]. which reminds me, I was having some problems with it happening every 20 days or so, so when I went to the lady doctor my mom asked about getting me on the pill. I have it now and haven't started it yet, but when my mom asked about it, she told the doctor I also had some pretty bad emotional problems during my pms.
now, we had talked about it before, but I never thought it was serious enough that she would phrase it in such a way to the doctor. or even tell her at all, really. it kind of perturbed me. I mean, I know how I can get, but I didn't think it was that abnormal. I had always thought my mom was just as emotional as I was. so...maybe I was wrong.
like I said in a previous post, I'm really good at putting things out of my mind when they bug me, but when I do think about this I get worried. in my life, I've always been the most "normal", in the sense that it seemed a lot of my friends had kind of crazy family life or emotional problems. I was always the one who was just fine. and then suddenly, I have an emotional problem? ARRGH! it makes me paranoid... mostly, like, I don't want to bother other people with my emotional problems.
what if I have been? what if all this time when I've thought I was right, I was just so drunk with emotion that I was blinded to what I should have been thinking or feeling? and that other people could see it, but they couldn't tell me... or if they did, I didn't accept it because I thought I was in the right? but when I look back on some decisions that may have been made in times like that, even now I don't regret them or think they were wrong. so does that mean I'm always crazy ? or just that my worries are misplaced? probably the former.
what is this anyway, the time of change? first I find out I'm 5'3, not 5'2, then I find out my bra size is so obscure it doesn't exist (28C). now I have issues with my pms. my whole life is turning upside-down! grrrr!!
(at least I'm going to Texas soon... where I will be able to ride the roller coasters... oh man...)
so, I'm home. safe and sound. and mildly unhappy.
well. I'm happy to be home. really. I've missed my family and the dogs and good food...etc. etc. But I'm very sad to leave my friends behind, even if it is only for three months. But still, after being with them every single day for the past ... 9 months... well. it's weird. really weird. and really sad. I'm really going to miss them. they are my norm.
and, I can't help it but... most of all, I'm really going to miss him. I'm going to miss our late-night conversations. I'm going to miss his smell. His voice. His laughter. it's so corny. but I really can't help it. until these feelings fade, I think it's going to be very sad for me for a while. I really don't want it to be that way. I know I want to be that "strong woman" that my mom always talks about. but I'm going to be sad for a bit. and I think that maybe that's okay. no matter how much the ones I love put him down in order to make me feel better, I can't help what I feel and that's that.
one day I'll be able to look back and not feel so pained, but for now this is who I am. this me, who can still feel his strong hand in mine, and still smell his intoxicating scent right beside me.
(yeah, intoxicating. I couldn't think of a better word.)
I'm sure if I start to think about it, I'm going to miss Betty just as much. she's been my pillar of knowledge and wisdom this past year. I probably would have gone crazy if she wasn't there to support me. in addition, just her herself I'm going to miss - her crazy comments and weird sarcastic humor... everything about her. wow, it sounds like she died, doesn't it?
(at least I have the hope of visiting her soon. banzai Utah!)
well, I better stop here before I start thinking about Kyle and everyone else too. not to mention my anime club friends. I need to try and remember that I will see them next semester... even though it won't be the same since we won't all be living together. I'm really going to miss that.
I'm going to see Spiderman 3 tonight!!!! AHH! SO EXCITED!!!!!
but, until then... what do I do? oh well.
I'm a little bit sad because I haven't got to spend a lot of time with Betty this week. She's been studying really hard in-between finals and stuff, so we didn't even get to make our final music video. It's very sad. If my mom & stepdad hadn't already taken tomorrow off so we could go out shopping and eating and whatnot, I'd totally want to stay tomorrow night. but, alas.
things still seem pretty normal. he came back today, and hung out in our room for a good half-hour or something, just the two of us talking about random crap. I'm glad. I was a little worried he'd be weird. though it seems like he got me a present <3 so I'm kind of excited.
dangit, there was something else I was going to say about him... can't remember. oh well. oh wait, I remember. when I talked to a guy friend of mine about it (duckie, actually), he said he thought he was pulling a "back-burner" sort of thing. not directly saying he liked me or didn't like me because he wanted to keep me around "just in case."
but I thought about it, and decided that I don't believe that's true. I know I can be decently naive at times, and I'm probably way too optimistic, and too often I believe in the good of people when maybe I shouldn't.......but I don't think he'd do something like that. beyond everything else, we're really good friends. I trust him. so I have to believe in that. if I didn't, then it'd be too hard. I don't want to think of him doing such a hurtful thing. I wouldn't want to be close friends with someone like that, and our friendship is something I don't want to lose.
I feel kind of tired now. there's an hour or so before we leave, so I guess I'll just...bum around for a while.
So, my period needs to hurry up and start so I'm not all PMS and shit.
(I start a lot of posts with "so", don't I?)
I feel better now, but I've been locked up alone in my room for most of the day, only interrupted by making Kyle hang out with me for an hour or so in the early evening. I worked myself into a little sad ball of pathetic-ness for a while after that, but then I started playing solitaire. And kept losing. So I got angry. And then I turned on Alanis Morisette and got even angrier. So I stormed around a little, kicked my cabinet, punched Betty's bed, and emptied out the trash.
I made my way down to Kate's room, where the gang was, and hung out for a little bit to calm myself down. It worked for the most part, especially when I got to tell Kyle later why I was frustrated. Kate offered for me to rant to everyone, but the subject of my anger wasn't really group conversation material. So after we left, he just followed me back to my room and I told him briefly. Good times.
Right after it happened (the conversation with him yesterday), Betty told me to beware of "rebound" relationships.
"Sometimes, after you have a really awful thing happen with some guy, a week later there's all of a sudden a new guy that you really like. And not just normal like, you really like him, and you've only known him for like two seconds. So then you date him and realize two weeks later that, uh, you don't like him so much after all."
So I'm trying to watch out for that, because I have a tiny little nagging feeling in me that it's happening just a bit. I've known him the whole year, he's a great friend of mine, and he's been super awesome and supportive of me these past couple days. But he's got his own thing kind of going on with another girl on the floor, so I really just don't want to go there. Even though I've always thought I'd be okay with dating him. I even said it to Betty sometime last week. Maybe that's a weird thing to think about. BUT anyway like I said I'm PMSing and it's also the end of the year, so I don't want to give myself the chance. It'd be too messy right now. I don't want to do the rebound thing. Bad deal.
Anyway... life.
oh... I guess it's that time again.
so, let's see what I did this weekend.
Friday, I went to the baseball game. We destroyed Texas 7-0. It was beautiful.
Saturday was insane. Betty, Katya, our Mexican friend Andres and I traveled to the Omaha zoo and spent like 4 hours there. It was fun.
Then, in the evening, the big event. The camping fiasco. (and it really was a fiasco.) Josh's grandparent's cabin ended up being flooded, so we rented a campsite at a place about 30 minutes outside Lincoln and... well, yeah. I ended up getting tipsy. No sickness, no craziness, just fun. I did give Kyle a bloody nose, though. It was a good time. I think it was a good crowd for me to have my first experience of alcohol with.
we got back around 8 am Sunday, and I was a slug all day. I didn't hurt, I was just tired because I didn't sleep well that night.
uhh.......I don't feel too blog-y right now, so maybe I'll write more later. WHO KNOWS!
So, let's go over this weekend.
Anberlin concert: FREAKING AMAZING OH MY GOD
no seriously. It was so awesome. Kind of scary though... I probably almost died... (yay moshing...?)
Josh definitely went insane. Everytime I managed to find him in the crowd, I just saw him flipping out and dancing around like a maniac. It was hilarious...
But then, at the end, he came over to us and was all "WHO WANTS A HUG?" because... he was amazingly sweaty and disgusting. I mistakenly gave him a hug. Seriously, it looked like someone dumped a large bucket of water on him.
We had a sleepover at my house instead of driving home that night. It was kind of exciting, except Josh fell asleep on the couch. Hahaha. We also took showers...
Saturday: Red & White game was fun... Josh and Kyle were totally crazy ... yelling and all that stuff. And a crazy old lady kept talking to me... she was cute though.
Then we had the Harry Potter tournament at 2! Ruth got stuck at home so John joined our team instead. We got to our House finals (HUFFLEPUFF!!), but lost by two points. Jerks.
After that, I took an hour and a half nap, and then we went to the Bathtub Dogs Spring Show. It was pretty cute, but I think I would have enjoyed it more had I not seen Anberlin the night before.
When we got back, we learned that John, who was participating in a Fight Night on campus, unfortunately got his ass handed to him and was headed to the hospital. It turned out to only be a minor concussion, but we all piled up in the cars and visited him anyway. He came home with us and life was good.
Today, I had my date with sir Alec of my music class. It was pretty fun. He seems like a cool guy, and I think if he asks I'll... probably go with him again.
Then I went shopping with Kyle to get a present for mister Josh, whose birthday is this Wednesday. But, alas, I couldn't find what I wanted (I'm hoping for a DBZ action figure... muahaha). At around 5 Betty, Katya, Josh and I went over a friend's house and had some good Iranian dinner. But that was kind of early, so I'm kind of hungry again...
I guess that pretty much covers it for now. We only have one week of real classes left, and then dead week, and then finals week...... dang. I can't believe it, so close to the end. WHERE HAS MY LIFE GONE?
on a final note, I think I feel more confused than ever about boys. I just want to be told straight out what the hell is going on... Arrrgh!
